>how not to release a leopard


>beginnings news

>Beginnings has become a registered user only site. Don't worry, though - registering is quick and painless. ;)

In order to register, just go to the Beginnings site and click the "Register" link down at the bottom of the login screen.



>Let's not think about if e-books will ever become a best-seller...

Let's think about what we will do if they ever do hit it big. Think DRM for Shakespeare and you can see where this is going...

Which reminds me of a story Richard Stallman wrote a while back. It just might turn out to be prophetic. ;)


>more waiting!

>Some times I think, "Ok, I can't feel any more pregnant than this!" and then I get proven wrong, lol.

I've realized I don't like feeling helpless or useless, and that is exactly why 2nd trimester seems so much worse than 1st. At least with 1st it was stuff like morning sickness... it wasn't like I actually had to stop doing anything I normally did or slow down doing anything I normally did. Now though I feel myself slowing down each day... and there's always something new that is suddenly a lot more difficult to accomplish. It gets frustrating at times... at other times I wonder if something is "wrong" with me... and then at other times I just have to sit back and sigh and accept that I'm just a baby carrier/incubator right now and there's nothing that can be done about it until May, lol (I know that sounds harsh but it's not meant to). Now I understand why they say active women are most likely to have the roughest time with fatigue.

I'm getting tired of the baby being "it"... I'm ready to find out if "it" is a boy or a girl already! That's not coming just yet though... my next OB visit is just going to be a pap and physical (at least to my understanding, they surprised me with the last ultrasound so they might do that again). So... right now I have an "it" kicking and flip flopping in my stomach, lol.

I am thankfully though sleeping soundly at night now... my pregnancy pillow came in, and it has a very fitting name - "Sleeper Keeper" (I believe the name may have changed to "Snoogle", or it's an alternate name, as the two products are the same thing). It's a rounded pillow that positions my body just right for whatever sleeping position I want to take... I can even manage to lay "on" my stomach now (technically the pillow holds me up so I'm not actually laying on my stomach).

I also found a way to fit in to several of my favorite pairs of jeans again... if you take a hair band and loop it around the button hole, then hook it around the button, it gives you some more room. :)

Now I just want to stop to say that David has been absolutely wonderful and I don't think I stress that enough... he looks out for me and tells me when I need to slow down at times I may be pushing myself too hard and not realize it... he helps me get around when I have a rough time or get "stuck" lol... when I get all bent out of shape because something needs to be done and I don't have the energy he'll take care of it... he shows an ungodly amount of patience with me when I get cranky... and he always has time to cuddle. There is also not a day that goes by without him telling me he loves me and that I'm beautiful. And he looks at me with such conviction and feeling that I honestly feel he *does* love me and he *does* think I'm beautiful and that it's not just words. He even pampers me in little ways, like putting my body cream on for me or massaging my back. And yes, I realize how very, very lucky I am to have him... there are a lot of guys out there that wouldn't do even half of what he does for me. He is going to make such a great daddy and I will be so proud to make him my husband! :D

Well, that's pretty much all I have to report for now... ciao!


>nakedness and umm… more nakedness

>Some times I wonder if some people have just gone plain retarded, and how I could've ever thought they were sane, intelligent people in the first place... ah well.



>I have found something that has me going "Foxmarks and Del.icio.us who?"

The yummy combo of Google Bookmarks and the Gmarks Firefox extension... unlike Foxmarks it integrates tagging into Firefox, and unlike Del.icio.us it seamlessly integrates into the Firefox menu system. Ultimately it completely eliminates any need for your old bookmarks menu. This is exactly what I've been looking for all along, and it's just an added bonus that it's Google since I already use Docs, Gmail, and Reader.

Now if I can only manage to trim down and organize my gazillion different labels my bookmarks will be perfect... hehe.


>guess who won…





>tummies, tummies, tummies ;)

>Wow, things have been interesting lately.

But first things first... I got tired of the smell of A&D and the stickiness, so I switched over to using the Exhale lotion I was using pre-pregnancy. I was low on that though so last night I had to go get some more lotion. Well, I decided to check out the tummy butters.... *wrinkles my nose* somehow I just couldn't bring myself to spend so much on 2 oz. of stuff I could mix up at home for cheaper (and get a lot more). So I started sniffing around the body creams and butters and I came across the body cream version of a milk-based lotion I used to love before I moved to SC by the name of Skin Milk (I couldn't find it anywhere up there for some reason). It has milk, whey protein, white lily extract, comfrey extract, avocado oil, and vitamins A, D, and E.... which at around $5 for 16 oz. really makes those tummy butters look pathetic.

Now for where things get interesting... or well, at least interesting for me. Sleeping. I did well with the body pillow for a bit but now I just can't settle down and I keep coming close to pushing David completely off the bed. The bed is choking me... not literally but it feels like it and I want to just sit up and get free of it, plus I keep having the most messed up dreams I've ever had in my life that just make absolutely no sense whatsoever. I'm really tempted to just start sleeping in the recliner, lol. I'm afraid that's what I'm going to have to do too if this keeps on, because above everything I don't want to be keeping David awake at night, it's bad enough one of us is having issues (me).

I keep worrying about how much I'm showing. I feel like I'm showing a ton although your average stranger can't even tell I'm pregnant, which SUCKS btw... every time someone says I'm not showing it almost feels like an insult that they think I'm that big normally, lol.

The baby started kicking the crap out of me the other day, lol. I don't know if he/she was trying to kick box or what but I do think I managed to get David to catch it in action so he felt it too.

I'm confused quite a bit right now. I have all this stuff happening - feeling the baby move, back pain, swelling feet, fatigue, palpitations, etc. - that says I am really in this pregnancy and then I have people saying I don't look pregnant at all and it makes me feel like crying because if I don't look pregnant why am I feeling this way? I keep questioning if I'm just not healthy or if I'm just lazy or what exactly could be the cause of me slowing down other than just being 4 months pregnant... I keep trying to push myself to be more active... but then I end up panting and hurting and tired and upset that I just can't keep up any more. Not being able to keep up and not being able to do everything makes me feel useless, and then when I just try to relax and take it easy and do things slowly I feel guilty for not holding my own. Half the time all I really want to do is sink in to a nice warm bath or prop my feet up and go to sleep cuddled up with some pillows. I thought this was supposed to be the honeymoon of pregnancy where you're the most active and feeling the best! :P In all seriousness 1st tri went a lot better... I wanted to sleep a lot and morning sickness was tricky but I didn't actually have a loss of energy and I pretty much kept to my old routines. Now it's just like.... well, it's not like I've really lost energy so much as it's like it takes twice as much work to do anything any more, even sitting up has became a chore all by itself and usually makes my back pain worse.

I'm not trying to complain, I'm just trying to understand why it's like this and if this is normal. Then again, I'm beginning to suspect there is no "normal" when it comes to pregnancy... just chaos, lol.

Oh, one last thing... my stomach seems to have umm, a heartbeat? I don't really know what to call it but you can see it moving up and down like it's pumping blood or something... I know that's probably normal, I'm just curious to know what exactly causes it... anyone know?


>some random thoughts about Thanksgiving

>This past Thanksgiving I was thinking really hard about something people don't usually think to give thanks for on Thanksgiving... the people that make it all possible. The cashiers, the clerks, the waitresses... the ones I know always have to work extra hard during this season... and even the people more behind the scenes that work at the plants that package all our food and goodies, since even though I don't know if they deal with a holiday rush I'm pretty sure they do. And that was what I gave thanks for first - the people that make it possible for us to be able to sit down to a nice Thanksgiving dinner or in front of a Christmas tree even though for some of them it means not being able to do the same themselves. I know full and well they don't do it just out of the goodness of their hearts, lol, but that's why we should be even more grateful to them, because they do it even though they may not want to do it.


I wasn't raised to celebrate Thanksgiving. The religion I was raised in criticized Thanksgiving, some of the key points being:

  • Its seeming relationship to pagan fall harvest celebrations

  • The fact that we should be grateful for everything year round and not on one particular day

Personally, I don't care about its past... we do a lot of things and have a lot of things that have pagan roots to them but that no longer are used for that purpose. Incense, for example. Wind chimes... writing... books, even... the list could go on and on. At some point of time all of these things were used for pagan worship... but we still use them and whatever they were used for in the past is long forgotten.

Yes, that means I could care less about the Pilgrims and the Indians sitting down to the first Thanksgiving meal as well. The Pilgrims later on killed and plundered the Indians after that.... it kind of loses all the warm fluffy feelings after you realize that, lol.

The point of the holiday to me today is to be able to sit and enjoy a meal with friends/family - some times friends/family that you don't get to see at any other time of the year - and to really sum up everything you have been grateful for over the past year and truly celebrate it - not just say thank you Jesus and be done with it. Or you can find something new and major you have to be grateful about that you maybe haven't been grateful for over the past year because you never really had the time to think about it. The feast reminds you of what we all can do if we roll up our sleeves and work together. There need not be any particular god involved because no matter what your beliefs/religion you can be grateful, you can work together, you can sit back and relax and reflect over the past year and how far you have come... and that's something that very few of us can do every day. After all, that's what "thanks-giving" means, right?


Sweet Potato Casserole (what I made this year)

  • 3 cups mashed sweet potatoes

  • 1 cup brown sugar

  • 2 eggs, lightly beaten

  • 1 teaspoon vanilla

  • 1/2 cup milk

  • 1/2 cup melted butter


  • 1/2 cup brown sugar

  • 1/3 cup flour

  • 1/3 cup melted butter

  • 1 cup chopped pecans

Combine first 6 ingredients. Pour into a buttered 1 1/2 to 2-quart casserole dish. Mix remaining ingredients together and sprinkle over top. Bake at 350


>sleeping issues

>Bed just keeps on getting more and more uncomfortable.... I think I spent a good 10 minutes last night just trying to figure out how to get comfortable enough to go to sleep. My pregnancy pillow hasn't came yet so I'm pretty much left to my own devices, lol. Last night I managed to get comfortable by either resting my legs on a pillow or placing it between them. Unfortunately, that wasn't enough and I woke up after 5 hours rolling around because I just couldn't get comfortable... that plus I have a random case of morning sickness and David's recommendation, laying still, just seems to make it more likely I'll puke my guts out in bed. Right now is one of those times I really wish I could be one of those people that can fall asleep in just about any position under just about any circumstances. I'm a finicky sleeper as it is and this belly just isn't helping, lol.

Man oh man do I wish my pregnancy pillow would get here soon, I could really use it.

*UPDATE* I checked on the shipping status of my pillow this morning, and evidently the holidays has them held up - I cannot expect it until the 26th. This doesn't work! :P So I found a cheap regular body pillow at Kmart's website ($10 if anyone is curious) which I hope the brick and mortar store carries here (which they probably do as I have never seen that particular store *not* have body pillows). That should suffice until my real pillow gets here. :)

*UPDATE 2* Of course, the store here doesn't have any body pillows in stock. :P Fortunately though someone gave me a loaner. :)


>hmm… something they don’t tell you…

>Ok, I want to know why no one told me that when the baby starts to outgrow your belly and your belly starts to protrude that it freaking HURTS! Resources all say you'll experience "some discomfort"... this is beyond discomfort. It's like wearing clothing that is too small only you can't take the clothing off because it's your skin... and your skin hurts because it's being stretched beyond your means. Then there's your belly button which is getting stretched and pushed so much that you're afraid you're going to pop and all your guts are going to come spilling out. Sometimes I feel like I have to hold my stomach just to keep it from exploding. :(

I have cooked up a little formula to make it feel better but even though the stretching skin pain goes away the belly button pressure does not. I was told by another woman that I can expect this for the next couple of weeks.... yay. *cough*

Anyways, this is what I'm doing right now to help relieve it... twice a day (once in the morning and once at night) I am massaging my stomach, sides, thighs, and breasts with Lubiderm lotion (the idea is that the massage stimulates circulation while the lotion provides moisture). Then I follow that up with a thin layer of A&D (I was trying the Lubiderm alone but it wasn't lasting long enough, so I knew I needed something to seal it in... A&D seemed like a logical seal due to the vitamins A & D - which are cell growth helpers - combined with lanolin, which soothes and also helps promote healing). So far it is working quite well... the Lubiderm gives instant relief and feels so nice going on... the A&D makes the moisture stay and after a few days with putting that on top of the Lubiderm the stretching skin "discomfort" has pretty much went away completely except when it's getting close to time to redo the lotion/ointment and even then it is very mild. I can reasonably take a shower too without any problems (showers used to feel nice... until I got out and my skin started drying off!).

That solution made me really happy too... I didn't know what to do, but I figured it out just based on what I knew about skin and what things would do what. It definitely helped me feel more confident in myself and my ability to deal with whatever comes up. And if I haven't got a clue there's always my mom and my grandma to ask, lol. Both of them have a lot of knowledge, albeit in different areas. Mom understands a lot of the baby gear and understands more about child mental development/psychology than she thinks she does. My grandma tends to know all the aches and pains and problems and what herb or vitamin or old school remedy will cure them, lol.

I dunno what to do about the belly button issue though.... I keep thinking of a belly belt but ummm yah I don't think that will work, lol.


>I’m not the only one now ;)

>The baby woke David up the other night kicking him in the back, lol. And now from time to time I feel it doing something... but I'm not really sure what it's doing... I just know it feels weird, lol. The best guess I can make is that it's just shifting position or something.

My skin on my stomach hurts, especially around my belly button... I think it's caused by my skin stretching. Something I've found that works EXTREMELY well for making it feel better is Lubiderm lotion. I cover my stomach, sides, and even get inside my belly button with it and all is well and it feels great going on as well (that particular lotion isn't creamy or greasy, just slippy... I guess that's where the name comes from, lol). And I know my skin is stretching because my belly button now is a huge gap instead of the little slit it used to be, lol. I just hope I won't end up having to take my belly button jewelry out.

And something odd is happening with my legs whenever I spend a lot of time up on them... they get all red and blue and purple and blotchy... it goes away after I sit for a while... dunno if that's normal or not, I can only guess it is as I know I'm supposed to expect swelling in that area and that may be just what's causing it. I can never tell if I'm swollen somewhere so it would make sense that I would notice that and not the swelling. :P

My feet and my back hurt almost all the time now, lol. Stretching helps a lot with my back, and my feet feel a little better if I just prop them up for a bit. I'm thinking about picking up some Epsom salts and another foot spa when ever possible as I'm sure a good foot soaking at night would do wonders.

I also really, really need the pregnancy pillow I ordered a while back, but it's not going to show up until Thanksgiving day. :( I'm not sleeping very well right now and I really think it's because I now have this big stomach that I can't lean on or lay on or any of that, it seems like with each passing day I come closer and closer to the only feasible sleeping position being on my back.... and we all know how much sleeping on your back sucks, lol. Not to mention I'm not even *supposed* to sleep on my back because I have problems with sleep paralysis and that more than anything (next to sleep deprivation) will trigger an attack.

Speaking of bed... I feel like a rolly polly in bed now, lol.

Oh, and I want to mention something that doesn't seem to get mentioned very often as being a pregnancy symptom (understandably too, as it's not really something you want to broadcast) but is very real... leukorrhea. Let me tell you right now you DO want to get panty liners as soon as this starts, it may start out light but it will get heavier (at least it did for me). Also, if you don't like the feeling of a pad, try the ones that are made for thongs... you can use them in other styles of panties without losing effectiveness and they have less there in the back which is where you usually tend to feel the pad the most.

And ummm hmmm... that's all I can think of to write about for now. :)


>safer sleeping

>ConsumerReports.org - Cribs, safer sleeping 4/07
# Don't dress your baby too warmly. Overheating may be a contributor to SIDS. Keep the temperature in your baby's room between 68 and 72


>sleep gear not to use

>ConsumerReports.org - Cribs, sleep gear not to use 4/07
Heirloom cribs. According to the Juvenile Products Manufacturers Association, approximately 50 babies each year suffocate or strangle after becoming trapped between broken crib parts or in cribs with older, unsafe designs. The JPMA advises consumers to buy a new crib rather than use an heirloom or a secondhand one, even if your budget is tight--or the crib has been in your family for three generations. Old or heirloom cribs can also have lead-based paint.

Co-sleepers. These beds allow infants to sleep near their parents for bonding and nursing. The Bedside Co-Sleeper by Arm's Reach Concepts, $200, for example, attaches to an adult bed with belts, giving a mom easy access to her infant. But the Consumer Product Safety Commission hasn't established safety standards for these products, so the American Academy of Pediatrics doesn't recommend them. In general, the AAP advises against co-sleeping and bed-sharing. If you bring your baby into your bed for nursing, return him to his own bed when he's done.

Sleep positioners. These wedge-shaped pieces of foam are designed to help babies sleep on their backs. Pediatricians and child safety experts caution against putting anything cushioned in a crib because soft materials could close off the child's air passages, causing suffocation. Don't believe store displays for these products. They give the wrong message. The AAP says that while various devices have been developed to maintain sleep position or to reduce the risk of rebreathing (inhaling exhaled carbon dioxide rather than fresh air, which increases the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome), such devices are not recommended because none has been tested sufficiently to show efficacy or safety.

Soft bedding. The safest crib is one that has a firm mattress, a snug-fitting mattress pad, and a fitted crib sheet--and nothing else; no puffy bumper guards, no stuffed animals, no pillows, no quilts. Experts have long recognized the suffocation risk inherent in such soft crib bedding. If you insist on a blanket, keep it at waist height, and tuck the ends firmly under the sides and bottom of the mattress. There should be no loose blankets in your baby's sleep area. If that sounds tough to manage (babies have been known to kick off their blanket), dress your baby in a footed sleeper, with layers underneath, such as a lighter-weight sleeper for warmth, or put your baby to sleep in a wearable blanket, such as the Halo SleepSack, $29.95 (www.halosleep.com), or the Kiddopotamus BeddieBye sleep blanket, $15 to $20 (www.kiddopotamus.com). If you decide to use crib bumpers, they should be thin, firm, and securely tied. Mesh bumpers are a very good option.

Not many people pay much attention to Consumer Reports, but they really do know their stuff and test products thoroughly... so when they say "don't buy", it's usually a good idea to heed their warning. And because of that it's one of the first places I like to look when I'm concerned about the quality of something I'm buying.

There were a few things on this list that confirmed funny suspicions I had but couldn't explain - like my desire to buy a new crib as opposed to using a used one. Then there were a few more things that surprised me, such as sleep positioners - something I had on my list and *thought* was a good idea - and crib bedding, especially after having been advised by quite a few people to make sure the crib had a good thick bumper.

Anyways, I thought this would be a good article to put out there for others to take notice of, since I'm sure I'm not the only one that didn't know about these.



>Something that really gets on my nerves...


No, not like party invites you get in the mail but like download this I'm on it invites, or go to this site I'm on it invites. They're freaking ridiculous, and annoying as all if you get a whole bunch of the same invite from different people at the same time.

It's not hard to avoid spamming your friends with invites. Most sites offer you the option of skipping the invite process. But they take advantage of one small annoying habit of the general population... blind click bys. What's that? Well my friend, that's where you just click "next" over and over again without even reading what's on the screen in front of you or what options are being offered. That's how your ISP screws you out of being able to legally expect ANYTHING out of them, even internet service itself, via the infamous "Terms of Service" i.e. "TOS". That's how the software companies rape you... but that's not the focus of this post. The focus is this:

Don't blind click by, first of all. That one is obvious. Second... and this one is aimed at the companies.... stop spamming us! Just because you found a legal slip by doesn't make it any less than absolute spam. It's crap, and I for one don't want it. In fact if I get a lot of spam from a site... even if it is coming from my friends... you better believe I won't be touching that site, at least not for a long time. Just because I HATE YOUR SPAM!

Third, I'm pretty sure there are those out there that actually think their friends WANT to get this crap in their inbox... I don't. I'm pretty sure there are others that don't, as well. If you really think a site is soooo great, do us a favor - tell us yourself. Don't rely on cookie cutter invites and you might find a few more than usual friends joining you on that site or service. ;)



>Wow, yesterday's post is really funny considering what happened last night... I felt the first kick! It actually woke me up, lol.


>I think I’m losing it

>I can't get rid of this paranoid fear that the baby is just laying there dead in my stomach and my body just *thinks* I'm still pregnant... I know that sounds crazy but I keep getting more and more worried about it and it's driving me crazy. I just don't feel like I can properly gauge if the baby is ok as long as I'm not feeling it kick and I'm not seeing it on a monitor or listening to its heart beat. I'm seriously considering renting or buying a fetal doppler just so I can make sure it's ok.

Am I crazy or is this just the mom syndrome?



>Heya, sorry for all the down time last night... I changed over to the parking page to do some work and forgot to unlock the domain before I changed the dns servers. All is back up and well, though. :)


>why don’t you agree with keeping our kids safe?

>Oh, please. Here it goes....

I have every bit of interest in keeping our kids safe. But I also don't believe in being a paranoid loon that wants to ban sex offenders from stepping foot outside their house, nor do I feel that banning them from Myspace is actually doing anything to protect kids any more than making them register their screen names and email accounts is going to help anyone "catch" them. Meanwhile the sex offenders that are just trying to get on with their lives are being punished while the real rule breakers go about their business and get away with it because we all feel so safe in this special little system.

Also, someone needs to show me where Myspace suddenly became a place just for underagers. As far as I was concerned it was just a site like any other site with a normal age range limit that excludes the kids not old enough to figure out whether or not they should be talking to a 27 year old that wants to meet them for "some fun". Ok, so what if he pretends to be a little kid? Wake up, if he's pretending to be a little kid he's not going to use his usual email address and unless he's incredibly stupid he's not going to register the email address he uses, nor use his real name. Oh, darn.... our system doesn't work...

That's why I don't agree with what Myspace is doing. Let's make a check list, shall we?

  • it's not just a site for kids, it's a site for everyone over the age of 13 or 15 or what ever their limit is, and kids aren't even a majority, so it's unnecessary

  • any one that's really up to no good isn't going to use their real name or registered email address, so it's ineffective

  • it punishes those that don't have any tricks up their sleeve and are just abiding by the rules, so it's self defeating

Now, they say the reason for it is not to try to police sex offenders so much as keep them away from temptation... has anyone noticed that Myspace profiles now allow you to prevent underage profiles from being shown to you and underagers from contacting you? Has it ever occurred to Myspace that they could just switch this feature on for sex offender profiles and leave it on permanently, if they're so worried about temptation? After all, see no evil....

I have a funny feeling this wouldn't work though, and I'll tell you why. Because I don't think it was really Myspace's decision to do this in the first place... I think they're just bowing to all the pressure from the media and caffeinated parents so they can go, "See? We tried! We have a super strict policy!"



>a little known secret about Myspace…

>BetaNews | MySpace Deleting Sex Offender Profiles
The MySpace profiles of a "few thousand" convicted sex offenders have been removed, the popular social networking site said Tuesday. But the company says it will not hand over the users' names to states requesting the data.

The company had previously announced a program in December that will identify and block sex offenders that were attempting to use the site. Called Sentinel Safe, the technology matches information on profiles with a database of about 550,000 sex offenders nationwide.

MySpace is also being pressured by the Attorneys General of eight states to hand over information on sex offenders using the site by May 29, although the company is declining to do so. It claims both federal and state laws prohibit the release of such information.

Those states requesting the release of data were: Connecticut, Georgia, Idaho, North Carolina, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Mississippi and New Hampshire.

So someone that I don't care to talk to messages me the other night ... I ignore their message but decide to send an email politely reinforcing my boundaries. The reply accused me of deleting his Myspace profile:

After you deleted my Myspace, you want to come and try to be mature? I don't have your stuff, eat a dick. I have no desire to talk to you...ever...again. I'm seriously praying you die in childbirth. I want you to leave me the hell alone, which obviously is to hard for you since you seem to want to continue to poke your self into my life and business. Get over me Jonquil and move on, be with your new guy that you're oh so in love with and say the same things about that you said about me, and probably the guy before that and the guy before that. Grow up kid. Grow up and leave me the hell alone.

Uhh.... yahhhhh....

Word up: Myspace doesn't want sex offenders on their site. They hunt them down and delete them. I don't agree with the practice myself but we won't get in to that... the thing is, if you're a sex offender, and you notice your Myspace profile is suddenly gone, there you have it - the reason why. You're better off joining Facebook, as far as I know they don't do this crap.

The reason why he thinks I did this is because of the post I made about backups. Word to the wise: Myspace takes weeks to delete a reported profile. Some times months. This is coming from someone who hunts phishers on that site for kicks.

The way I know about the sex offender thing is because someone I know was having the same exact problem. He put up a profile, kept it for a couple of months, and then one day it disappeared. He went through probably about 4 accounts, refusing to email Myspace about it, so I started doing some research. What's really funny about it is at the time I thought it was only a matter of time before this other person's profile got taken down, considering he had just starting being required to register. I also wondered if he would start blaming me for it. I guess I found out.

BTW, remind me to stop giving people the benefit of the doubt.



>I think it is safe to say that I now officially have pregnant belly... you're starting to be able to tell I'm pregnant no matter what I wear (excluding maternity clothes). And it makes me feel the urge to cover up with a jacket a lot, lol. It's not like I'm horrified by it or anything, but I'm just somehow shy about it showing. Maybe it's just the Scorpio tendency to hide things, who knows. *shrugs* I'm ecstatic that it's finally here but at the same time I don't want just any stranger on the street knowing it too, lol.

The acne seems like it's finally gone as well, thank god for that. Not a pleasant symptom... I'm now thinking about our child reading this... sorry babe but not everything about the pregnancy is roses, lol. It doesn't mean I love you any less though. ;)

It is also getting hard to get around. No more laying down and just being able to bounce right back up with out some maneuvering around the fact that I have no tummy muscles, lol.

I'm kind of wondering how big the baby will be... from what I can understand I'm showing rather early and that's supposed to be a sign of a big baby, or twins. But I might just be doing like my mom, too... she carried so heavy with me that they thought I was going to be twins, and I wasn't a big baby either - just 7lbs, your usual average.

My back has been killing me! LOL... to my understanding that's normal at this stage, it has something to do with ligaments stretching, but I really did not expect the aching back to come until I was nice and big, lol.

No kicks yet. :( I'm waiting eagerly for that... I have felt the baby move but it's so light it always leaves me wondering if it was just my imagination or something.

Anyways, that's all that has pretty much been up.... it's so boring at this stage. :( First kick and I'm going to start reading to the baby... that will be fun... if I started that right now though I know I would just feel dumb because I don't have any sign of life down there to tell me it's not wasted effort.

So here I wait patiently.... waiting for your first kick....


>i wanna write damn it

>I wish to speak to you of the importance of backups. Backups are vital, and I rarely see people back their crap up the way they should. You don't have to backup everything in existence or even make multiple backups, just one will do, the fact is - you have one just in case. And that "case" often comes a lot more often than we would like.

Today I tried to log in to my del.icio.us account that I haven't used in several months but decided I wanted to start using again in conjunction with foxylicious to organize my bookmarks. I usually have a small handful of passwords I use that change frequently for important accounts, but with not so important ones - like a freaking social bookmarking website that I have a serious love sometimes/hate the rest of the time type relationship with - I use the crap password. The crap password is the one that changes once in a blue moon and that gets used on lots of sites I don't really care about.

Now, someone knew the password to that account, and changed both the associated email account and the password so I can't access it. Had that only been my only backup of my bookmarks I would've been screwed. Lucky for me it wasn't even close - I keep a hard media copy plus another sync tool with a different password associated with it, this one one that changes frequently.

The digital age is great. Someone burned family photos including baby Polaroids... that sucks, but it's not nearly as devastating as it could be - I have them all backed up on both hard media and online. Scanners are good like that.

The thing is you can't be lazy though. It's not just blind luck, it's foresight. Ok, some day I might blankety blank blank and lose this, so I'll back it up some where else. I don't understand what is so hard about this concept for some people. Think about before computers... you got two copies of a picture along with the negative just in case... you kept your letters and important papers locked up safe and tight... and not to say you don't still do those things, but now that those things are moving in to a digital form, doesn't it make sense to back them up just in case as well? Computers and the internet are not magical things that will keep everything nice and safe for you forever. Actually nothing is but that's going beyond the point. ;)

You would be surprised at how many business owners don't back up their files. You'd be surprised at how many business owners can't spell the freaking word "business".

I wanna be sedated.


>finally finished

>So now vixenk.net is Surreality, Beginnings, and "David's Blog" (he hasn't decided on what to name it yet, lol). And I am pretty sure I don't want to go through that again for a while. :P

I was thinking about ads today.... we have ads on our clothes, food, electronics, transportation, and we can't even entertain ourselves without being bombarded with ads. There's a label for everything... no wonder we're so prone to labeling people too, after all, everything else in our world has a label. In fact, if you want to go even deeper, we label everything in our lives, right down to our illnesses. Why, I wonder.... why do we feel this need for everything to have a name, a label, an explanation, something that makes it stand out and be noticed as different from the next thing to come around? Is it a part of our need to communicate or is it something else?

LOL, and I can't really type right now because I have a cat determined to take the place of the laptop. :P


>aaand… we’re done!

>Everything is set up and ready to go, including the archive. So vixenk.net and now its subdomains are back in business. :D


>moving along…

>We are almost there, yay! Right now the only thing left is setting up an archive subdomain for the old site. The rest are up and functional, though, so go check them out! :P


>first post…

>... and I can't think of anything to talk about at the moment, lol, I'm too tired from working on getting this whole domain together. :P


>ah, new beginnings…

>... and I couldn't resist coming up with a new layout to go with it, lol. Well, I cheated some, I grabbed a template and then modded it to suite my tastes, lol. I'm still working on vixenk.net... this has turned out to be a nightmare, from ftp client foul ups to dns server issues preventing me from getting work done. I tell you what... my employer sure did lose one knowledgeable agent, lol. In the end, though, that wasn't what they were looking for anyways, and they weren't what I was looking for.

So what am I looking for? I'm looking for a bright idea I had when I was 12. I'm looking for something I enjoy doing. I'm looking for something financially fulfilling. I'm looking for



>So as you may have noticed, this site is undergoing some changes. Just sit back, chill, and relax - we'll be back in business soon. :)

Yes, I'm using a template - bite me. :P

So what am I up to? Well, by the time this is over, vixenk.net is just going to be a home/news page for three subs - all of which I'm setting up myself (which explains why I'm using templates, lol).